Karnit Goldwasser, a slim, attractive Israeli, stands before the Allied Jewish Federation board to call attention to the continuing plight of Gilad Shalit.
Since Shalit was captured by Hamas in June, 2006, his family has received only two letters. Both sounded dictated, not reassuring.
The International Red Cross (IRC) has neither visited Shalit nor requested to visit him.
He is still alive, Goldwasser says in a soft, impassioned tone.
Perhaps no one is better equipped than Karnit Goldwasser to mobilize Jews on behalf of a missing IDF soldier.
Her husband Ehud (Udi) Goldwasser and fellow IDF reservist Eldad Regev were kidnapped July 12, 2006, during a Hezbollah raid on Israel. Three hours after they were captured, Israel launched the Second Lebanon War.
For two years, Goldwasser lacked definitive news about Udis condition even whether he was alive or dead. But instead of withdrawing from the world, she challenged it.
Goldwasser regularly met with the Israeli government, global heads of state and the IRC to try and bring her husband home.
She was deeply in love with Udi. For her, abandoning hope was not an option.
A soft-spoken woman who never sought the limelight in her northern Israeli hometown of Nahariya, she became a ubiquitous presence on the world stage of public opinion.
Goldwasser even crashed Iranian Presidents Mahmoud Ahmadinejads 2007 press conference at the UN and demanded why he refused to allow the Red Cross to visit the captives.
So it went, day after day, month after month, year after year.
Goldwasser worked continuouosly. She slept only a few hours at night, always making sure her cell phone and laptop were in reach.
I never had a proper Shabbat dinner while Udi was in captivity, she says. I had no taste for the bread because I didnt know if he was alive.
I was just thinking about how to bring Udi and Eldad, for it was always the two of them home.
In July, 2008, Goldwasser finally learned that Udi and Regev died of injuries sustained in the 2006 Hezbollah raid. But Hezbollah would not release the bodies until Israel agreed to a prisoner exchange.
Udi Goldwasser and Eldad Regev were returned to Israel in coffins on July 16, 2008.
A young wife mourned, and a nation grieved.
Seven short months later, Karnit Goldwasser is crisscrossing the US on behalf of Gilad Shalit.
How does Gilad feel? she asks. Forgotten? That he will be there for the rest of his life? We must let him know that we wont forget.
We have only one country, you and me Israel. Stand with Israel during this crisis and continue to the end. Do as much as you can, until the very end.
When Goldwasser concludes her presentation, the room gravitates toward her like bees to honey.
Raz Arbel, Denvers Israel emissary, ushers Goldwasser into his office at the federation for a private conversation with the IJN.
Overwhelmed and tired, she consents to the questions without complaint.
Prior to Udis kidnapping, Goldwasser says her biggest problem was deciding what to eat, she laughs softly. I never had to handle these big issues.
Whenever I set a goal for myself before, I was of course very anxious to finish it. But it was always a reasonable goal.
Everything changed when her husband was captured.
Suddenly this studious and slightly reticent woman took on world leaders, governments and the press.
No, I wasnt afraid, Goldwasser says. I had nothing to lose. And I got my strength from Udi. I was doing it for him. You cant really think about yourself when someone you love is in crisis.
Despite two long years of silence and uncertainty, she refused to stop hoping that Udi was still alive.
I think no woman, no wife, no mother, no sister can lose hope when her loved one is missing, Goldwasser says. Its against nature.
While she was informed her husband might be severely injured, members of Israels intelligence community constantly told her he could still be alive.
And whenever something is possible, there is hope.
With the exception of Goldwasser and Regev, all the soldiers killed in the Second Lebanon War were counted, returned, buried and mourned.
The unknown is the worst part, Goldwasser says.
When you find out that someone you love has died, there are ways to handle the loss. There is a funeral; a procedure. When a person is injured, there is a doctor, a hospital.
But you dont know what to do or feel when someone is kidnapped. I cannot say that knowing for sure a person is dead is better. For me, the worst part was not knowing.
Israel invaded Lebanon on July 12, 2006, to recover Regev and Goldwasser and put an end to Hezbollahs shelling of northern Israeli towns.
Political pundits, however, have suggested that Prime Minister Ehud Olmert used the captive soldiers as a pretext to invade Lebanon.
The day Hezbollah kidnapped Udi and Eldad, [Hezbollah chief] Hassan Nasrallah started shelling northern Israel, Goldwasser says. No one thought a war would start.
When Udi and Eldad were kidnapped, they were in Israel, not Lebanon. If you look at the facts, we didnt attack them, they attacked us.
At the beginning, we assumed there would be some kind of military operation, not a war. The only person who woke up on July 12 and said, Im going to start a war was Nasrallah.
Olmert is a prime minister but hes also a father and husband, she says, her eyes flashing a defiant glint.
I dont care whether he was trying to make political points. Im dealing with the facts, and the facts are that he did it. He started a war to get my husband back.
On July 16, 2008, Israel swapped living terrorists to retrieve two dead Israeli soldiers.
Many people including Israelis vehemently opposed the trade.
The swap didnt just bring people here and bring people there, Goldwasser contends. It brought our values back. It united us. In those two days, all Israel mourned. Some people tried to go to work, but they couldnt. All Israel felt like one big family.
It was not a matter of transporting people from one place to another. It was like all for one, one for all. All the colors she looks to Arbel, who supplies the word her fingers vainly try to grasp were bleached. We were all one color.
During the shiva for Goldwasser, Israelis from all over the country traveled to the Nahariya home of Karnits mother.
A thousand people a day came to my mothers home. There was no room to sit. One elderly woman told me, I was going to send you a letter but I cant hug you in a letter. So here I am.
Goldwasser says she has a large family and an extended family of friends.
A lot of people are taking care of me.
Karnit and Udi both grew up in Nahariya but didnt start seeing each other until 1997, when they both entered university. They were married on Oct. 14, 2005.
You cant know youve met the right man, she says. You just feel it. It runs in your veins.
Goldwasser has often said, Udi was my soul.
Now that he is gone, how does she manage to live without her soul?
She is unfazed by the discomfiting question.
For two years, I was speaking for the two of us, she says I tried to do the wise thing, and what I believed he thought was the wise thing. It probably wasnt always the same. But it didnt matter.
Udi was my soulmate.
Death severed their physical connection, but now Goldwasser feels her husband always in my private way.
And even though her intensive efforts to rescue Udi and Regev failed, she has no regrets.
None, she says firmly. I succeeded. I brought Udi home.
This was my goal.
