Anniversaries this week harkened back to terrible tragedies in our state, nation and people’s history. It was the 21st anniversary of Columbine, which left 13 dead and started the epidemic of school shootings. It was the 25th anniversary of the Oklahoma City bombing, the worst act of domestic terrorism in US history. It was Yom HaShoah, marking the deliberate decimation of European Jewry. Through it all, there’s the backdrop of the coronavirus pandemic.
I have lived a relatively privileged life. I’ve had struggles, certainly, like everyone else. But I have never — again probably like most people — had to endure the type of trauma that irrevocably alters one’s life.
Living through the coronavirus pandemic is probably the most existentially threatening experience I’ve ever had, even though, due to my age, I’m not even at a high risk of being negatively impacted by it.
But there are people who each and every day think of the traumatic event that shaped their lives. People who survived Columbine, or lost family there. The same for the Oklahoma City bombing. The Holocaust. Those who lost loved ones in war, or terror attacks.
I can’t imagine there being a singular event in my life that I would think about each and every day. I guess I’m getting a taste of it with the coronavirus. It’s certainly all-consuming. There’s no better feeling at the moment than realizing I haven’t thought about it for a few hours. And while it’s hard to imagine right now, there will be a day — and quite frankly it can’t come soon enough! — where 24 hours will pass and I won’t think about the coronavirus.
In his 1914 book The Psychology of Learning, Edward Thorndike established decay theory, the idea that the less we access a memory, the more it will decay over time. Does the opposite hold true? The more one accesses a memory the more present it remains in our mind?
I’m so lucky that I don’t know the answer to that question.
Shana Goldberg may be reached at shana@ijn.com
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