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Tipping point

UNFORTUNATELY this past week’s mikveh scandal involving the accused Rabbi Barry Freundel is another in a chain of scandals that has been creeping upon the Orthodox Jewish community, painfully with all too much frequency. Sadly, I know that other denominations in Judaism are riddled with their own share of scandals. Being Orthodox, though, I am more familiar with and — for better or for worse — feel more affected when the scandals are from within the Orthodox community.

The Freundel scandal needs to be the tipping point in the Orthodox community. It is time to create a paradigm shift in rabbinic leadership.

Many of the scandals, including this one, are generated by aberrations. Perverts, disturbed personalities or criminals masquerading as authoritative rabbis ruin it for the rest of all the wonderful and devoted rabbis out there. Ruin it, rationally or not, as in breaching the congregant-rabbi relationship, perhaps irreparably.

The central tragedy of this story is, of course, the terrible pain and violation done to innocent, vulnerable women in a moment of private sanctity.

But this story has many angles to it.

Read related IJN news coverage, “Converts say Freundel went well beyond peeping” and blog commentary, “Asymmetrical power

One of them is the lack of accountability by rabbis, or better put, a lack of checks and balances within the rabbinic leadership infrastructure. This is tricky because, by definition, being a rabbi is different from an ordinary authoritative position, such as CEO or physician. A rabbi is meant to be a spiritual guide. So how does it exactly work for the congregation at large to be evaluating the rabbi? Indeed, it is a delicate matter.

It needs to be given much thought, with the results being concrete and tangible ways of increasing transparency, accountability and boundaries (otherwise described by the Talmudic sages as “gedarim”), and more regulation, all while maintaining and not undermining the authority of a rabbi.

A rabbi has a lot of power over people. Especially over someone undergoing a conversion process — as this scandal has highlighted as well. That power cannot remain unchecked.

A healthy rabbi, as I assume most rabbis are, will join the rabbinate out of a sense of devotion and mission to Judaism. But there are always those narcissists or perverts for whom becoming a rabbi is a perfect way to nurture their darker and disturbing tendencies.

Let’s face it. Had Rabbi Freundel wanted to see what he was recording in his little clock device he could have accessed those types of images and experiences elsewhere online. So why specifically record congregants or women he personally knew? There seem to be issues of control at hand, a certain a corruption of power, not mere perversion.

No new system of checks and balances will be foolproof. There will always be some who will escape the tightest of systems and hurt people.

But I can’t help but wonder, would a more regulated system have sifted out an apparently controlling and disturbing guy like Rabbi Freundel?

WHAT about the voice of women and mikveh? This too is a crucial conversation within the community that needs to take place. The truth is, beyond mikveh, women’s voices need to become a stronger part of the conversation when it comes to women’s rituals, especially ones that belong to them, such as mikveh.

I am not talking rabbinics here. There are plenty of ways to include women more without it having anything to do with smicha.

One final point. I know this might seem comical, given that there is no other other profession criticized more than a rabbi. But when I worked as a mediator, it was a standard part of the conclusion of a mediation that I ask both parties what they felt my strengths or weaknesses were. What worked for them and what did not.

A similar process should be in place regarding a rabbi. Congregants and members should feel they can formally give feedback, even criticism (with dignity, of course), about something a rabbi is doing that makes them uncomfortable. This should not be limited to a board, but an opportunity for all congregants, taken seriously by a board.

Trust has been painfully breached. It will probably take years until this trust, this ne’emanut, will be repaired. Do women now feel safe going to the mikveh? Even if such a fear is irrational — if Freundel was in fact a one off — this feeling must be taken seriously and approached with sensitivity.

An overhaul is overdue. Something is not right in the system and needs to be changed. It’s sad it has come to this, but trust can never be taken for granted, not even by a rabbi. Perhaps especially by a rabbi — a person who wields so much power.

The truth is, this is nothing new. The Talmudic sages (Chazal) understood this, as well as human nature, very well. Hence all the many gedarim boundaries or “fences” they instituted, especially centering around privacy and intimacy issues. In modern day parlance, these gedarim could be termed regulation and accountability. Their point is checks and balances to prevent certain wrongs.

It is time to take the lead from Chazal and for the Orthodox community to reevaluate. Not only for strategic PR reasons, as it is utterly humiliating to keep reading of Orthodox crimes of power, indiscretion and dishonesty. But for the sake of doing what is right and ethical in general, as well as to heighten our awareness, sensitivity, compassion and inclusiveness toward people undergoing a conversion process.

Copyright © 2014 by the Intermountain Jewish News



Tehilla Goldberg

IJN columnist | View from Central Park


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