ANDREW Gelston Graham, 23, who was shot to death in the early morning hours of Friday, Nov. 6, somewhere between a light rail station and home, was remembered Tuesday at Feldman Chapel.
Although uniformed police were present, the gentle life of this peaceful, brilliant and free-spirited young man eclipsed the madness that robbed the world of its promise.
Rabbi Jay TelRav started the service singing “Esa Einai.”
If the words were unfamiliar to many, the spiritual tone comforted their hearts.
“Our friends grieve in their darkened world,” he said. “In their silence there is lamentation, in their tears there is loneliness. Hear them, Oh G-d. Be with them.”
Rabbi TelRav recited Psalm 8 and read from Ecclesiastes: “For everything there a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven. A time to be born, a time to die . . . ”
There was no grief-stricken storm, only the gentle rain of private memories in search of peace.
“In times like this, questions naturally arise in our mind,” Rabbi TelRav said. “Questions that trouble us. We despair of never finding satisfying answers. What is death? Why are people we love taken from us? Why do some people live long years and others die before their time?
“We know that these are questions to which there are no answers. They are problems that people are not meant to solve.
“We can only affirm that the life of an individual has had a deep and lasting impression on us, leaving with us memories of years shared, memories that shaped our lives, and experiences that have enabled us to view the world with a different perspective.”
Andrew Graham possessed all these qualities.
The most important task now, Rabbi TelRav said, is comforting the living.
“Is there a sorrow greater than this? Where is our consolation? Let our silence reach out to the bereaved family. Let their tears fall on us. Let their anger break on us.”
Graham’s athleticism and intellectual prowess at Cherry Creek High and CU have been recounted in numerous media accounts.
At this service, however, his love for poetry and the beauty of words emerged repeatedly.
His sister Rebecca read “Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening” by Robert Frost, one of Graham’s favorite poets.
She spoke of the brother “who always had my back. He came out of nowhere when you needed him.”
She concluded with “The Road Not Taken,” epitomizing Graham’s refusal to become a contented cog in a bureaucratic wheel.
Born Jan. 26, 1986, he was brilliant from the beginning. He only earned one B at CU, but what pleased him most was playing on the Frisbee team. While his peers listened to hip-hop, he played the musical masters of previous generations.
“If fashion dictated one way, he chose another,” Rabbi TelRav said.
Cynthia, his mother, read “Passages:” “I am at peace. My time grows short. I know myself and have seen my destiny, my paradise. I could exist here until the end of forever?. . . My time is near its end. But I will know this place again. The moment of my birth has arrived, and my soul has a new beginning.”
“I know this is how Andrew feels now,” she said.
John, Andrew’s father, looked out at the crowded chapel and sighed.
“I just wanted to take a minute and see everyone who was here,” he said.
“A couple of years ago, Andrew told me that he felt like a ghost or a spirit, flitting in and out on people’s doorsteps, hanging for a while. And then he’d leave –– and show up again.
“We’re not going to see him at our doorstep anymore,” he said, “but I think you can plan on seeing his spirit from time to time. He’ll show up when you least expect it, stay for a little while, and then he’ll ‘peace out.’”
Those who had managed to hold tightly to their tears finally let go.
Graham is survived by his parents Cyndi Gelston and John Graham, and sisters Caryn and Rebecca Graham.
THE murder of the 23-year-old CU graduate occurred during the early morning hours of Nov. 6.
His body was discovered at 5:30 a.m. on a lawn in the 8700 block of East Phillips Place in a quiet subdivision near County Line Road and Yosemite, less than a mile from his parents’ home.
His wallet, money and credit cards were undisturbed, as was his satchel, which police found nearly two blocks away, according to Arapahoe County Sheriff Grayson Robinson.
“It’s an ongoing investigation,” Robinson told the IJN Monday. “We have some information, but nothing of any significance.”
Asked whether Graham was shot by a lone assailant, Robinson declined comment.
“It appears to be a random encounter,” he said. “What the motivation was has yet to be determined.” Because officials recovered all of Graham’s personal belongings in the area, robbery does not appear to be the motive.
Arapahoe County Coroner Dr. Michael Dobersen announced Monday morning that Graham died from severe internal injuries from a single gunshot wound to his torso. The time of death was not disclosed.
Law enforcement officials agree that Graham “was a very good man, a very gentle man, with a purpose in life and an extraordinarily promising future,” Robinson said.
Graham, who was scheduled to begin post-graduate work in math and engineering at CU next semester, spent Thursday evening in Boulder looking at apartment rentals.
He was last seen alive on a security camera at 11:40 p.m. Thursday night as he departed the light rail station at County Line Road and I-25. Investigators said that Graham normally got off at the Dry Creek Road station.
Graham, who did not own a car and relied on public transportation, routinely walked a few miles from the light rail to his home.
He was a local resident, but authorities would not release his address.
Footage from the light rail security camera is now central to the investigation.
Authorities planned to release the videotape to the public on Nov. 10 to encourage potential witnesses to come forward.
“Andrew was just going about his life,” Rabbi TelRav told the IJN Monday.
“The randomness of this act is so hard to understand.”
TelRav, who has been helping the family since the murder, says they “are strong. They’re doing about as well as you’d expect. They are surrounded by friends and family, and grateful for the outpouring of support.”
AT a Sunday, Nov. 8 press conference, Graham’s mother Cyndi described her son as a “kind of modern-day hippie, but with a good soul and a caring spirit. He would have made a great father. He would have made a wonderful husband for someone.”
A Temple Sinai member who lives in the neighborhood where Graham was found but wished to remain anonymous, told the IJN she took the Arapahoe light rail downtown the following Monday.
“What happened did not stop me from going,” she said, “but I did pause and think of Andrew. I felt a sadness, and a sense of connectedness.”
Sheriff Robinson said he did not think “anyone in the area is in danger because we believe this was a random incident. This community has never experienced anything like this. It’s totally unusual.
“But in a case like this we always encourage people to be cautious and aware of their surroundings, and to call us if they see suspicious individuals.”
People with any information about what happened to Andrew Graham are urged to call the Arapahoe County Sheriff’s Office at (303) 795-4711.